Wings of Change – Change Your Life Articles

A healthy self-esteem is a starting point for a happy life. Unfortunately, when you lack self-esteem, you also lack the ability to reach your true potential. Why? Because your thoughts are truly powerful!

It All Starts With Your Beliefs

Most people have heard the statement, “If you can dream it, you can do it,” but few people actually take it to heart. For some reason big goals seem unattainable and an “I can’t” mentality takes over.

While everyone experiences negative thoughts from time to time, you may need to make an extra effort to get through these challenges. Positive thoughts must be victorious in the end!

Tips For Developing Self-Esteem

Developing a healthy self-esteem doesn’t need to be a difficult task. There are small changes you can make to get yourself on the right track.

Try following these strategies to help you develop a healthy self-esteem:

1. Ignore negativity from others. For some reason, many people get into the habit of putting others down. You know you shouldn’t listen to these people, but sometimes you take what they’re saying to heart. It’s especially hurtful when it’s coming from someone you love.
   • Some people will even steer you in the wrong direction because they think they’re doing the right thing. When it comes down to it, you’re the only one that knows yourself and your dreams. You simply can’t let anyone stand in the way!
2. Learn to accept compliments. You might toss off compliments as lies because some people may have ulterior motives. While this might be true, in most cases people are being genuine. After all, most people won’t go out of their way to give you a false compliment.
   • Accepting compliments will help you discover what you’re good at and strengthen your self-confidence.
3. Get a life coach. Life coaches are in the business of helping you live your life to its fullest potential. You don’t need to be scared or embarrassed to seek one out. If a life coach doesn’t seem feasible for you, you can look into getting some self-help guides.
   • Go online or to a local bookstore to find some relevant workbooks and resources.
4. Use affirmations. Affirmations are great self-esteem boosters because they show your brain what you already know you can achieve. They bring positive energy into the present moment.
   • You can read affirmations on the subjects of your choice or you can get into the habit of writing your own affirmations. Nothing can be more targeted to your true feelings than your own words!
5. Avoid comparing yourself to others. It’s easy to get into the habit of comparing yourself negatively to other people. Remind yourself that everyone is unique. You’re equipped with your own set of strengths and weaknesses, so the best thing you can do for yourself is concentrate on developing your own strengths.

Follow Your Dreams

Once you’ve worked on your initial feelings about self worth, it’s time to take a step in the right direction. A part of a healthy self-esteem is having the drive to take action toward your goals.

Have a plan and follow through. If you feel that you’ve improved your self-esteem but then fail to take action towards your dream, it will only be a matter of time before your self-esteem begins to wane again.

When you’re faced with challenges, actively seek solutions. When you do, you’ll soon notice what a positive role your healthy self-esteem plays in your life!

The meaning of life is one of those sought after quests that can never truly be answered. There are just too many opinions and personal definitions for any one meaning to be true for everyone.

Also, there are certain topics in life that can simply never be fully described with mere words, such as true love and true self.

Some will say that discovering the meaning behind true love and your true self is the meaning of life. What do you think?

Discovering Your Purpose

While you might feel a bit confused, you can start to find meaning in your life by discovering your true purpose. For some, this comes easily but for others it may take some deep soul searching. Your true purpose is not necessarily a job or something concrete, although it could be. There are no rules to follow, just the rules set out by your heart.

Try some of the following activities when searching for your true purpose:

1. Brainstorm. Find a time and place where you can have some quiet self-reflection. Just start writing down ideas on what you think your true purpose might be. You may not arrive at it at first, but you’ll eventually come across something that hits the nail on the head.
2. Activities and hobbies. Reflect on your favorite activities and hobbies. Can you turn any of them into a life’s purpose? Some people feel that if they take their hobbies further it’ll start to feel like any old job. This won’t be the case if you’ve truly found your purpose.
3. Skills and intelligence. If there are certain skills and abilities that you’re good at, perhaps you should try pursuing those, even if you didn’t think you wanted to before.
   • Also, you might want to look into a theory called Multiple Intelligences by Howard Gardner. Gardner describes how everyone has a type of intelligence and it might not always be what is typically accepted as intelligence, such as a high IQ.
4. Happiness. Ask yourself whether or not you’re happy in your current life situation. If you are, perhaps you’ve already found your life’s purpose or you’re on the correct path to it. If you’re unhappy, see if you can isolate the reasons why. Once you know why, you can take action to correct the imbalance.
5. Regrets. Make an effort to let go of your regrets. These never serve a positive purpose in your life. However, if you identify your regrets, perhaps you can use them to help you discover your purpose. Perhaps there’s something you regret that you can correct. Often times, it’s not too late to make a positive change!
   • For example, if you’re in your 50s and you always wanted to go to college, you shouldn’t let anything stand in the way between you and your dream.
6. Religion. If you’re a religious person, it’s likely that your religion discusses life and meaning. Search through religious books or seek out a spiritual advisor to learn more about the meaning of life.

Follow Your Bliss

To put it quite simply, if you’re following your bliss, you’re on the road to discovering your true purpose. You’ll also be discovering your personal definition for the meaning of life.

Remember, you’ll always have outside influences when it comes to finding life’s meaning, but following your heart is the only true answer.

It’s hard to keep regret out of your life. No matter where you find yourself today, there’s a chance that you’ll have certain things you wish you did differently. When you strive to look at your situation with a different perspective, you’ll gain a better understanding about life and you’ll learn to live without regret.

While you won’t be able to completely eliminate regret in your life, you can take steps to reduce it. Strive to keep your life organized and live your life your way.

Establish Your Priorities

One way to begin living without regret is to sort out your priorities. Ask yourself what ultimate goal you’re working towards. Are you happy with where you are and where you’re going? If you’re living your life according to plan and you’re happy, then you have nothing to regret.

If changes need to be made, taking small steps may be of help to you. Once you’ve made decisions that you’re comfortable with, you may feel as if a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. This is regret leaving your life!

Live By the Golden Rule

Everyone can benefit by living his or her life with the golden rule in mind. The golden rule is known in all of the world’s religions. It’s special because it’s a concept that we can all agree on, despite our differences.

Simply stated, the golden rule is: “Treat people the way you’d like to be treated.” If you do this, you’ll definitely keep your regrets to a minimum. You’ll be learning how to treat people with kindness no matter what. You’ll be learning how to treat people fairly and you’ll gain empathy. When you put yourself in someone else’s shoes before you act, you’ll be less likely to engage in an act that you’ll regret later.

Take Swift Action

The next step is to take swift action in your life. You only have one life and the time is now. If your goals are clear and you know what you want, what are you waiting for? A common regret is not doing the things that are truly important to them. You need to do these things instead of putting them off until tomorrow!

Have you always wanted to start your own business? Start one! Would you like to get back in touch with your father? Do it! Yes, it’s difficult, yet it’s also simple once you’ve made the commitment to act.

Spend Time with Loved Ones

Spend all the time you can with your loved ones. If they live far away, visit when you can and call often.

Make time for your immediate family by scheduling dinners together or family nights out. Delve deep into the relationships you have with your family. A common regret is sticking to surface topics when it comes to your family. Find out the hopes, fears and even regrets of your family members. Sharing your regrets can be another way of coming to a resolution!

Forget Regret

Ultimately, it always comes down to the fact that you can’t change the past no matter how hard you try, nor how often you think about it. All you can do is take action now to change what happens in the future.

Regret clouds our current thinking and stands in the way of a happy future. But you have the power to blast through regret and move forward with your life!

Dr. Joe Vitale, motivational speaker and author, often says: “the fastest way to get where you want is to be happy with where you are.” Believe it or not, this mindset works! It may take some changes and soul searching on your part, but in the end, it’ll be more than worth it to adopt this positive mentality.

While you should strive to make your dreams come true, concentrate, also, on yourself and your journey. When you spend less time wishing things were different and more time accepting what you’ve got, you’ve already found a sense of peace and happiness right there.

Here are some tips that can help you become who you want to be right now:

1. Feel gratitude. When you concentrate on the big picture, it’s easier to exhibit feelings of gratitude. When you’re grateful, you remain positive and appreciative of every joyful moment in life.
   • Sometimes people get too caught up in a sense of entitlement, which leads to negative feelings. Concentrating on gratitude, instead, will get you where you desire.
     
2. Be optimistic. Some say that life is all about optimism. And it’s true! An optimistic attitude is one of the few things you need to succeed.
   • If you’re trying to achieve a concrete goal, optimism will help you accomplish it.
   • If you’re trying to change your mindset, optimism will make the task easier.
   • Optimism can be the driving force that keeps you going.
     
3. Exhibit the traits you desire. It was Gandhi who said that you should be the change you want to see in the world. With these wise words in mind, you can replace wanting with some bold action. With some persistence and perseverance, you can make it happen.
   
4. Adopt a prosperous mindset. Take a moment to determine what prosperity means to you. Are you hoping for money, a fulfilling career, or a relationship that lasts a lifetime? Know what you want, then adopt the right mindset. Once you do, you’ve then set yourself in the right direction toward your goals.
   
5. Find the silver lining. As you go through life, you will no doubt realize that things are not always going to go your way. But even in tough times you need to keep your chin up. Instead of allowing negativity to consume your life, seek out the silver lining. This fresh attitude can be the difference between being held hostage and achieving your goals.
   
6. Take small steps. When the place you’re going seems far away and unachievable, it’s important to break it down into small steps. Give yourself an achievable goal with a realistic time frame. Break that one down into smaller goals.
   • When you avoid getting overwhelmed, you’ll gain the confidence to persevere.

You’re Already There

It’s a good idea to practice one of these tips at a time until you’ve incorporated them into your life. Perhaps you can spend a week perfecting one strategy and, then the next week, add another one to your repertoire while continuing with the first one. Soon enough, you’ll be a natural at all of them!

Once you choose a powerful and positive mindset, you’ll find that you’ve already achieved much of what you want. Just remember: You already have the traits, mindset, and lifestyle you desire, and you know that success is inevitable, but only when you have the will to break through the obstacles in your mind!

It seems that everything you’ve ever learned is about preparing yourself for a better future. It’s easy to get so caught up in the future that you lose the ability to enjoy the life you’re living right now.

The Power Of The Present

The first thing you should do to take action toward a better life is to realize the power that the present moment holds. There are different ways you can truly come to this realization, but the most popular and widely accepted method is meditation.

Meditation allows you to clear your mind. It’s refreshing to focus on the present moment when you find the time to sit down and relax without any worries about the past or future.

This personal reflection time will allow you to sort out your inner thoughts. On the flipside, take note of the number of times your mind tries to distract you from the present moment. You’ll be surprised to see just how many times your mind steals the present moment from you, in order to dwell on the past or future.

Enjoying The Journey

Your journey is all you have. Your goals are important, but it’s the path you take toward your goals that yield many fruits. You must be willing to enjoy your life and live consciously, even if you haven’t yet reached your goals.

If you have a lofty goal, such as becoming a doctor or the CEO of a large company, realize that it will take much planning and years of experience. Once you reach your goal, you may feel fulfilled, but your life mustn’t be unhappy and miserable until you get there!

You can remain happy by concentrating on the present and enjoying the journey. As you make positive progress towards your goal, you’ll know that you’re always one step closer.

Envisioning Your Future Self

While you should spend a great deal of time enjoying the present moment, you can add to your happiness by envisioning your future self.

Reflect on the feelings associated with the successful completion of your goals. Think about the traits you’ll exhibit when you have the life you desire. Now bring those traits into your present.

If you’re studying to be a doctor, you’re working long days for little or no pay. You’re studying at all hours with little sleep. You might feel almost tortured. That’s not the desired life you dreamt of having!

This is when you should be proud of the steps you’ve taken so far. After all, what you’re learning now will shape your future, so you might as well approach today with joyful gratitude!

Live The Life You Want Now

Whether you maintain complete focus on your ultimate goals or not, it’s important to live the life you desire right now. You don’t know how many days you’ve been allotted on this earth, and you owe it to yourself to make the most of them!

Keep these tips in mind:

• Even on busy days, take at least some time for yourself
• Don’t waste your time on people who don’t believe in you and your abilities
• Adopt a “glass is half full” mentality

Most importantly, you need to believe in yourself. Some people are literally afraid of success. They’ll put off action toward their dreams indefinitely because they fear success and fear that they’re incapable.

You mustn’t fall into this negative pattern. Don’t waste your time on dead ends. Instead, take action, learn your lessons, and enjoy the journey!

Your instincts will often kick in and tell you to resist change. This might happen without you even noticing it. This happens because the body and mind are always looking for stability and balance.

However, whether you like it or not, the world is ever changing. If you don’t learn to change with it, your life will eventually become stale and unexciting. If everything stays the same your whole life, you won’t be reaching your ultimate calling and your level of happiness and success will be mediocre at best.

The good news is that there are steps you can take to learn to conquer your resistance to change. You’ll learn that it doesn’t have to be a huge insurmountable task; you can work slowly and efficiently to gradually allow the change into your life.

Instigate Changes Daily

One thing you can do to start getting used to the idea of change is to familiarize yourself with the feeling on a daily basis. These don’t need to be large changes, but when you make the effort to step out of your comfort zone a little each day, you’ll start to see life from a different perspective.

When you make small changes, you’ll actually evolve your daily routine. You’ll discover quicker and more efficient ways of doing things. Also, since you’re engaging in small changes, it won’t feel as shocking to you and you likely won’t feel an intense urge to resist.

The small changes can be as simple as trying different kinds of toothpaste, or reorganizing the files on your computer in a different manner. They seem like boring tasks but this will set you up for a renewed mindset.

Take A Different Route To Work

You may be used to taking the same route to work every day simply because it’s the shortest. Your brain then becomes so used to the routine that you’re basically on autopilot.

Taking a different route may take you longer to get there, but it’ll open you up to change. You’ll have to think about where you’re driving and remain aware of your surroundings.

Eat Different Foods

You may think that you already know what you like and don’t like. It’s easy to fall into the routine of eating basically the same meals each and every week. However, your diet can be an excellent way to bring about change in your life in a non-threatening way.

There are endless recipes and combinations of food out there. There are also many styles and cultures available when it comes to cooking your food. You can make a goal with yourself to try adding something new to your diet every week. You may end up not enjoying what you ate, but when you’re trying 52 new meals per year, you’re bound to find some new gems!

Remind Yourself What Change Has Brought You

At the end of the day, remember all the wonderful new experiences and relationships that change has brought you. While there are inevitably bad things, there are sure to be many great things as well. When you concentrate on the positive, you’ll keep up a good attitude.

Keep in mind that change is good for you. Since nothing in life is static, you need to make change a normal part of your life. You need to be willing to move yourself forward to reach your ultimate goals. When you do, you’ll find that you’re happier and more fulfilled in life!

It’s easy to get drawn into a negative relationship. It may have started out seemingly perfect, but things seemed to change overnight. It may be time to decide whether or not the positive attributes outweigh the negative ones when it comes to your relationship choices.

If you’re unhappy and emotionally drained after a break up, you might not be feeling too optimistic about throwing yourself back out there. However, opening yourself up to new opportunities is the only way you’re going to reach the happiness you seek.

The best thing you can do is to educate yourself well enough to know what to look for and what to avoid. It’s not a fail-proof plan, but by following certain strategies, you can increase your chances of a lasting relationship.

Try taking these actions to avoid negative relationships:

1. Avoid falling back on the wrong person. If you’re feeling particularly lonely, you may feel the urge to fall back on someone that’s not right for you. Deep down you know that this person is not “the one” and yet you come crawling back anyway trying to convince yourself that maybe the person can change. Chances are, they won’t.
2. Spend time getting to know your partner. Focus on getting to know your partner first before getting too serious in the relationship. Try to have some of the heavy conversations near the beginning of the relationship. This way if you hit major snags you can either decide to work through it or move on quickly.
3. Learn your partner’s history. Are there disturbing events in his or her past? It’s clearly best to avoid people who have a history of violence or intense addiction. If they do and you choose to proceed with the relationship, be extra cautious and set the ground rules from the beginning.
4. Avoid manipulative people. You might not realize it at first, but if you find that you’re being manipulated often, it can prove to be a serious drain on your relationship. If your partner is controlling and always has a selfish motive for their actions, it isn’t the best relationship to be in. Recognize these red flags when you see them and get out before you get too attached.
5. Make a checklist. Take some time to make a list of the qualities you’d like to see in a partner. Include qualities you like as well as qualities that you dislike. This checklist will help you determine whether the relationship is right for you. Here’s a tip: avoid writing down superficial characteristics such as looks. First and foremost, you must be attracted to his or her personality because the superficial things can and will change as you age.

Relationships can be difficult; it’s just a reality of human nature. The fact that many relationships end shouldn’t have any impact on your hope for the future. There are plenty of people out there that will be a good match, so it’s okay to avoid relationships that sap your soul.

Remember: you do have a choice! Focus on finding the right partner for you and then take action to make it the positive relationship you’ve always dreamed of!