Trusting your inner instincts is an important skill to learn, although there are times when your mind can play tricks on you. When your body and mind are under stress, it may be difficult to see the difference between good thoughts and those that arise from fear.
Dealing With Fear
No one enjoys dealing with fear; however, it’s a necessary part of a fulfilled life. The best line of defense is to practice remaining calm and ask for help when you need it. After all, two minds striving for a rational solution is usually better than one.
When Not To Trust Your Thoughts
Even in difficult circumstances, you probably have an idea about what is truly right or wrong. However, it’s a good idea to try to recognize the situations where you tend to have trouble thinking clearly. That way, when these situations do come up, you can start working on solutions, instead of giving into the cloudy thoughts.
You probably shouldn’t trust your thoughts in the following situations:
- When you’re under stress – People often don’t recognize how detrimental stress can be to the mind and body. Stress can cause you to make unwise decisions and think too quickly. Stress can take over your body and produce hormones that alter your thinking patterns.
- When you’re feeling anxious – There are varying degrees of anxiety that can affect anyone at any time. When it takes over in a strong manner, such as when you’re dealing with crippling fear, it can lead to erratic, irrational thoughts or even panic.
- When you’re having negative thoughts – Sometimes you’ll have a bad day or even a bad week. Having a tough time can cause a negative thinking pattern that can cause you to think unreasonable or even absurd thoughts. You may start to have angry or depressing thoughts that can’t be trusted.
When you’re having thoughts that seem real, but are rather unreasonable, remember that it’s not coming from you. Rather, it’s coming from the build up and repression of years of self-doubt, negativity, stress, anxiety, or even past circumstances. That’s precisely why you cannot trust those thoughts!
Dealing With Your Feelings
You now know that negative thought patterns can arise from stress, anxiety, fear or even the past. Crippling fear, unfortunately, hurls many strongly negative feelings your way. But it’s how you deal with them and proceed with your thought patterns that make all the difference. Strive to take time to cool down and relax your mind before making important decisions.
One way to know if something is your true feeling is to wait a few days before making a decision. For example, if after a week of thinking something over, you still think the same way, then it’s probably true. Of course, you first have to ensure that your mind isn’t under attack from stress, anxiety, negativity, or fear.
Healing From Fear
If you find that you’re frequently in fearful situations, you can concentrate on healing those feelings. When your mind begins to race, take in a large dose of oxygen. Believe it or not, deep breathing is a signal for your mind to relax and think clearly. So breathe deeply and breathe often!
Also remember that you’re not alone. You have people who can help you and you shouldn’t feel shy to ask for that help. If you feel uncomfortable talking with a family member or friend, consider the help of a coach or counselor.
Just remember to avoid taking drastic actions that arise from fear. Take your time when making decisions, breathe deeply, and seek the help you need to overcome the grips of fear.
If you find yourself afraid of an upcoming speech, you’re not alone. The fear of public speaking is one of the top fears out there, but you can still do something about it.
You hear over and over again that practice makes perfect, and this also applies to public speaking. Any sort of public speaking – even when you speak out in your group of friends – can ease you into the public speaking role.
Here are some actions you can take to reduce your fear of public speaking:
- Be prepared. In most public speaking situations you can use notes. Make sure you organize your notes and break them down into an organized list where you highlight two or three key talking points. If you can’t use notes, simply make it a point to practice your speech until you feel comfortable saying it in front of others. You might still have some fear, but being well prepared can definitely combat this feeling.
- Don’t expect perfection. It’s important not to expect that your speech will be perfect. In fact, chances are your audience doesn’t expect perfection either. They understand that everyone makes mistakes and they, themselves, may be afraid of public speaking! You might skip over a part of your talk or stutter a little, and these are all natural human mistakes.
- Speak in small groups. If you’re uncomfortable speaking in front of a large group, then start small. Practice on small groups and ask for feedback afterwards. You can have a confidential feedback form, or you can just ask participants what they thought of your speech.
- Have a backup plan. It’s always advisable to have a back up plan in life situations and public speaking is not an exception. Think about what you might want to say if you get stuck. If your mind goes blank, take a deep breath and start your backup plan. Chances are you’ll find yourself back on track before you know it.
- Relax. It’s important to get yourself into the right mindset before you have to speak. Consider starting a ritual that you find relaxing in order to keep your mind off of your fears. You could meditate or do a crossword puzzle, whatever it is, just choose an activity that helps you relax.
The Audience
The audience is the whole reason that you’re afraid to make your speech, but it helps to know that they’re on your side. Keep a positive attitude because chances are good that the audience wants you to succeed in your speech.
In the end, it’s important to remember that even if you do mess up, it’s not the end of the world. As long as you’ve prepared yourself well enough and have a back up plan in place, you’ll be able to pick yourself back up if you trip up anywhere in your speech.
After your presentation, it’s important to take notes and critique yourself on how it went. Write down your observations on what you did well in addition to areas of improvement.
As you continue to practice your public speaking skills, you’ll get better and more comfortable in time. Just keep at it!
Failure has touched the lives of everyone at some point. Because of this fact, you know how horrible it can make you feel. No wonder you strive to avoid it at all costs! But the problem is that this fear of failure can become one of your biggest life fears.
Fear of failure is a fear of the great unknown. You don’t know what’s truly out there, and so you’re scared. You might even be tempted to give up entirely in order to avoid failure. You’ll soon realize that not trying at all is the ultimate failure because there is no way to win without trying.
How can you overcome this fear and gain the confidence you need to seek the life you desire?
Consider trying one or more of these actions steps:
- Imagine the worst case scenario. Of course, you should spend time imagining everything turning out well, but it actually helps to imagine the worst case as well. This is because, while horrible, imagining the worst case gives your fears a face. Your fears are then no longer the unknown and they may not be quite as scary.
- When you figure out the worst thing that can happen, you just might realize that the most a failure can do is to delay your ultimate goal. But if you can figure out how to get past this possible delay, you’re back on track!
- Take bold action. The fear of failure can hold you hostage. When you take bold action, you’re able to learn from your mistakes so you can continuously moving forward.
- Talk to successful people. Ask them about times that they’ve failed or times that they’ve felt a fear of failure. It’s likely that they were afraid too and that they’ve even failed greatly before reaching success. Knowing that you’re not alone can be quite helpful.
- Utilize affirmations. Use the help of affirmations in order to change your mindset about your fears. Affirmations can help you reprogram your subconscious mind so that you believe you’ll succeed, which will encourage you to take action to make it happen.
- Know that you’ll try again. Tell yourself that, if you’re face to face with failure, you will pick yourself up and try again no matter how many tries it takes. Then follow your plan.
Don’t Be Afraid Of Help
Since the fear of failure is so common, there are many people around you that you can talk to about the subject. You might feel like you’re alone, but you’re not. Discuss your issues with a trusted friend or use the services of a professional counselor.
Sometimes just having someone listen and understand you can make your fears seem like less of a burden. It can help you to get into a positive mindset, which is the first step you’ll need to take in order to tackle your fear of failure head-on.
The Long Term
After you’ve mastered your fear of a particular situation, keep at it in order to stay on top of your fears. The key is consistency and positive thoughts. Remember that there are always lessons to be learned on your journey, even if you’ve failed. Keep at it and good things will come!
