Wings of Change – Change Your Life Articles

Failure is simply a stepping-stone on your way to success. Of course, this doesn’t mean that it’s easy to deal with or something that should be taken lightly, but how you deal with failure will determine not only your future success, but also how easy it will be to achieve.

Everyone has different coping mechanisms and ways they react to failure. However, learning the ways that more often lead you to success can help you enormously!

Here are some tips on how to pick yourself up after you fail:

1. Learn from your failure. There is a lesson to be learned each time you fail. Discover what this lesson is and keep it in mind during future attempts at success. If you don’t learn from your failure, you’ll keep repeating the same mistakes.
2. Forge ahead. It’s completely normal to feel like giving up when you’re first hit by failure. The most important part of failure is what you do afterwards. So strive to have confidence in yourself. This experience may very well be your last step before you reach great success!
3. Surround yourself with good people. It’s a good idea to be surrounded by like-minded and positive people. This is especially important when you’re dealing with the negative emotions that may accompany failure.
   Positive people will inspire you to pick yourself up and go further than you thought you could go.
4. Set goals. If you’ve failed at a large task, think about setting smaller, immediate goals. If you build your way up to completing a difficult task using small steps, each step may not feel so overwhelming. When you’re finished, you’ll be amazed at what you achieved!
5. Visualize your dreams. Fight the negative thoughts that creep up after failure by visualizing yourself meeting your goal. Take the time to picture yourself successfully going through each step it will take to reach your goal.
6. Be enthusiastic. When you first set out to achieve something big, chances are you approached the task at hand with a great deal of enthusiasm. If you meet failure once or even several times, it’s important to maintain the enthusiastic force to give you the energy and drive to continue toward your goal.
7. Write it down. Keep a journal that details your personal thoughts, goals, and attempts. It will help you stay organized and focused on success. Another good exercise is to write your goal on a piece of paper and place it somewhere where you can see it several times each day to remind yourself to take action toward this desire.
8. Don’t dwell in the past. The past doesn’t have to be your present or future. Just because you had a setback, it doesn’t mean that it will continue to be the case. The only way to achieve your goals is to keep trying.
9. Think about the worst case scenario. What’s the worst thing that can happen if you fail? Some people are so concerned with success and have such a horrible fear of failure that they don’t consider whether or not the worst case scenario is all that bad!
   Realizing that failure may only mean a small delay toward your eventual success can alleviate some of your fears and give you the confidence to succeed.

Just Keep Trying

It’s likely that you can think of someone you know who set his or her mind on a goal and would stop at nothing to achieve it. It’s not just some kind of story or fantasy – this could be you, too! Adopt this drive and apply it to your situation.

When you believe in yourself and your abilities, you’ll gain the drive to keep moving forward and you’ll feel unstoppable.

What’s easier: Working toward your goals alone through trial and error, or seeking the guidance and direction of someone who’s been there and done that?

The answer is obvious. When you seek the advice of someone who has been through it all before, you can then avoid the same mistakes and focus your time and energy on what truly works. That’s the power of a life coach.

Imagine yourself with a set plan and just the right advice. Coaching may shave years off the time it would have taken you to reach your goals otherwise!

Here are the top 7 reasons why you need a life coach:

1. Builds confidence. You know you’re under the guidance of someone successful and that your goals are attainable.
2. Guided plan. Sure, you can draft up a plan by yourself, but when you write out your plans with the help of a coach, you know you’re getting a realistic plan that works! Your coach will know shortcuts and can help you stay accountable as well.
3. Conflicts. Coaches can help you cope with current conflicts and tensions in your life. They can also give you tips on how to avoid similar situations in the future.
4. Personal attention. Coaching allows you to get one on one attention so you can be personally guided along your chosen path. If you run into struggles, your coach will be there to provide much needed support and suggestions.
5. Dealing with challenges. Things will not always go according to plan. When you hit a snag, your coach can help you overcome the challenge and steer you back into the correct direction. You can feel comfortable knowing that you’re receiving expert guidance.
6. Versatility. You can decide how you’d like to use your coach. Do you want help with short-term goals or long-term goals? Perhaps you’d like both.
7. Enthusiasm. Your coach likely has a great deal of enthusiasm for their work, which will naturally rub off on you. Sometimes it may be difficult to keep up your drive, but thankfully, inspiration is one of the main reasons why coaches exist.

Finding a Coach That’s Right for You

There are a few tips you should keep in mind when searching for a coach that will mesh well with your personal style. The first concern is that your coach should have certain credentials and experience. It depends on the field you’re in, but ensure you do your homework when it comes to checking up on your coach.

See if you can find testimonials and reviews about potential coaches. Ask around and try to talk to someone else who has been coached by this person. After all, a good referral is always more trusted!

Communicate with your potential coach and see what his or her communication style is like. Ask yourself whether or not you think you’d get along well with this person. Some people might think the coach is fabulous, but if you don’t think you’ll personally communicate well, then it may not be a good fit for you.

Make sure your coaching sessions will be conducted in a format that you find comfortable. Ask yourself whether you’re the type of person that needs to meet face to face. Nowadays with technology we can communicate in many different ways. Coaching sessions can take place over the phone, email, video conferencing, or in-person.

In the end you should be proud of yourself for seeking expert help. Follow these strategies to find a great life coach for you and jumpstart your journey into the life you desire.

Many might find it shocking that meditation can be used to boost confidence. The truth is that meditation can be used to strengthen any emotion or skill.

When you meditate, you bring a great amount of awareness into your mind. In the moment of meditation you hold the power to decide exactly what your life is all about. The past and the future melt away, and all that’s left is you. So when you actively decide to boost confidence, you will!

Bringing Past Feelings Into The Present

The first thing you should do is familiarize yourself with the feelings associated with confidence. Take a moment to recall different times in your life that you felt especially confident. How exactly did you feel?

For example, maybe you remember a time when you entered a sports competition. You trained hard and you believed in yourself. How did you feel right before you started?

Let’s say that you now have to lead a group of people at work. You’re feeling a little scared about it because all of the details are not falling into place as you’d like. Meditate on the feelings of confidence. Bring the positive emotions from past successes into your present and approach your problem with those positive feelings instead.

Picturing The Future

In order to strengthen your meditation skills to encourage greater confidence, it may help to picture future circumstances turning out in your favor. When you sit down to meditate, be very detailed in your visions. Use the confident feelings you know you have and place them into the situations you’re envisioning.

This activity is a good idea to try if you feel that negative emotions are overtaking you. However, for the most part you should be concentrating on the present moment and taking life one breath at a time.

Staying In The Now

Sometimes you’ll feel negative emotions, the opposite of confidence, when you’re overwhelmed with problems. This is when it’s especially important to stay in the now.

When you meditate on each breath and focus on the present moment, you’ll realize how very simple life is among the complexity. You’ll be able to calm down. With a calm head you can then reach for the confidence you seek.

Remember these tips as you meditate:

• Find a place where you can be alone with your thoughts.
• Sit in an upright position with good posture.
• Fight the urge to take a nap or go to bed.
• Take deep inhales and long exhales.
• Pause in between breaths.
• Repeat a mantra or affirmation to yourself as you breathe in and out.

Meditating Often

Meditation is an art that takes practice. Just like anything else, when you practice often you’ll get better at it. You shouldn’t just use the art of meditation when you feel that you need it. Strive to make meditation a part of your every day routine!

Soon you’ll find that you won’t have to try as hard to reach your meditative state. Understanding and confidence will become part of your life and you’ll feel a greater power within.

It’s easy to talk and read about meditation, but it’s quite another experience to do it.

In theory it sounds like such an easy and delightful practice. The truth is that you’re likely to get bored at first and you’ll probably make excuses about whether or not you really have the time for it. Strive to remain disciplined and keep up with your practice. When you do, you’ll experience a true inner peace and confidence like never before.

Bad habits can form without you even knowing it and they can prove to be difficult to break. However, it’s always the first step that’s the most difficult. Once you get started, you’ll build both momentum and confidence.

With a proper focus and willingness to succeed, you’ll find that you can overcome any bad habit. Then you can choose to replace that bad habit with a more positive one.

Breaking Bad Patterns of Behavior

Before you can tackle the problem of replacing a bad habit with a good one, you’ll need to be mentally prepared to detach yourself from the habit. A strong mindset allows you to tackle nearly anything!

Keep these tips in mind as you prepare to transform your habits:

• Get organized by figuring out the bad pattern you’d like to break.
• Start small, with one habit at a time. Trying to change too much at once can overwhelm you.
• Decide that you truly want to change. If you don’t want to change, you simply won’t.
• Don’t judge yourself. If you make a mistake, get back in there and keep trying.

The Substitution

The key to permanently breaking a bad habit lies in being able to replace it with a good one. If you engage in a bad habit and decide to simply stop entirely, it can be incredibly tough. You might be okay for a while, but chances are you’ll find yourself back to your old bad habits in no time.

Consider some of these situations for substituting good habits for bad ones:

1. Exercise. Exercise is an excellent substitution for bad habits. Exercise can make you less likely to overeat and help you battle other addictions as well. With exercise, instead of just trying to refrain from the addicting activities, you’re actively releasing your energy in other ways.
2. “Being social” and other excuses. Sometimes we say that our bad habits happen in social situations only. It’s true that we’re social creatures, but certainly you can be social in ways that aren’t detrimental to your health! Change your routines to avoid the temptation.
3. Taking action. Your solutions don’t have to be conventional or from a textbook, but they do have to work for you as an individual. Strive to take action and stay the course, even if you stumble from time to time.

Fulfill Your Needs

You must learn to fulfill your needs in a healthy way. Chances are you’ve developed a bad habit because of an underlying need. Identify this need and find positive ways to fulfill it.

You might need to do a little soul searching in order to find the true underlying causes for your bad habits. If you have a bad habit of grinding your teeth at night, you might need to ask yourself why. Taking an action like wearing a mouth guard is one thing, but maybe you also need to take action to get to the root of your stress!

You might engage in many negative actions because you don’t feel needed and loved the way you think you deserve to be. This is the root of the problem that we often ignore. Masking the pain with self-destructive habits is clearly not going to solve the issue. Instead, discuss your concerns with family, friends or a health professional and be proactive in solving it.

Following these tips to help you turn bad habits into good ones may take some time and effort, but the benefits of a happier and healthier life are well worth it!

If you’ve recently suffered burnout, you’ll likely be looking for ways to restore your peace, health, and happiness. It’s important to treat yourself lovingly after such a trauma to your system so you don’t develop chronic health conditions.

Burnout can cause all sorts of mental and emotional issues, including anxiety and depression. You should try to recognize the signs that lead to burnout, but this may not always be possible. If you concentrate on restoring yourself after burnout, you can avoid these issues and get your true self back.

Consider these burnout tips to help you regain your strength:

1. Find a new direction. The best, most permanent, way of dealing with burnout is to focus on making sustainable life changes. Ask yourself whether or not you’re happy in your current situation. Perhaps it’s time to make a major life shift, such as a new career or changing your home.
2. Take a break. It’s best to get away from the situation that has caused you to burn out. This may mean going out for a walk and getting away for a few hours, or it may mean giving yourself a full blown vacation.

• You don’t necessarily have to spend a lot of money for a vacation. Your goal is to relax and clear your mind. You can certainly do this at home or in your local community.

1. Solve the problem. If you’re currently in the middle of a stressful situation, take action to solve the problem right away as best as you can. Consider the possible solutions to the problem and ask for help from others if necessary.
2. Gain control. Take control of the situation where possible. Realize that you can solve your problems and you’re not doomed to remain in this state forever. Also, have the wisdom to accept that there are situations that are beyond your control.

• Do what you can to improve your situation, but avoid worrying about the things out of your control.

1. Be open and honest. Sometimes it’s best to set your pride aside and ask for help when you need it. Open up about the issues you’re facing with a close friend or relative. If that’s not an option for you, seek the help of a counselor.

Stress Management

If burnout tends to be a common occurrence for you, it would be in your best interest to start studying some stress management techniques.

There are certain things you can do to combat stress:

• Don’t take on too much at work or at home.
• Remember that you can – and should – tell people “no.”
• Make time for yourself.
• Ask for help from others.

Know Your Warning Signs

Once you’ve suffered burnout, you’ll certainly want to know how you can avoid a similar situation in the future. Study the factors that led to burnout, and identify your mistakes so you can avoid making them again in the future.

In the End

These strategies will help you regain peace with yourself. If there are any outstanding issues that you need to resolve, seek solutions so you can achieve peace. You can do so through self-reflection, prayer, meditation, and communication. And once you do, you’ll avoid burnout altogether!

Worrying about what the future holds is one of the most common fears. Often times you’re anticipating the worst while, at the same time, realizing that a life in fear is not very pleasant at all.

Fortunately there are certain strategies you can use to conquer your fear of the unknown.

Try implementing some of these techniques to conquer your fears:

1. Think about the outcomes. When you’re approaching an unknown situation, it helps to make a list of all the possible outcomes. Some of the results may be good and some not so good, but feeling like you have just a little foreknowledge about the future will help to ease your fears.
2. Clear the mind. Make an active effort to clear your mind. One of the reasons you feel fear is that you’re worried that something bad is going to happen. This could be because of a situation from your past that you’ve projected into the future. You need to take these thoughts off the table and approach your fears with a clear head.
3. Take positive steps forward. It sounds easy, but it may be difficult to put into practice. Strive to visualize everything turning out positively. If you concentrate more on the positive aspect, you can actually turn your fear into excitement.
4. Study fear. Fear has a real purpose in appropriate situations. The experience of fear makes your heart rate rise and you’re better able to escape threatening situations. However, humans have built many unnecessary and non-life threatening fears. Once you realize that these types of fears serve no purpose, you’ll be stronger for it.
5. Talk it through. You might be feeling alone with your fears. It helps to talk through your problems with someone close to you. Perhaps it’ll help to discuss your fears with someone who has experienced a similar situation. Just knowing you’re not alone can ease your fear, even if the person doesn’t have any especially helpful advice to give.
6. Start small. If you’re afraid of the unknown in a general sense, starting small will help reduce your fear. Instead of tackling a seemingly huge insurmountable task, just try doing something small first. Break out of your comfort zone for a little bit and try something new you’ve never tried before.

Present Thinking

When your thoughts get caught up in the future, whether it’s the near future or the distant future, it clouds your current situation. If you’re especially fearful, take a step back and focus on what is going on in the present moment.

Your present thinking automatically allows you to take things one step at a time. If you’re currently doing the laundry, for example, the only thing you should focus on is getting stains out or putting clothes in the dryer – or positive things you look forward to. Brush other worries away and live in the here and now.

This isn’t to say you should never think about the future. When you think about the future, do it with a clear head and positive thoughts and without letting the fears bury you.

Following these strategies can alleviate your fear of the unknown and bring you a life full of enthusiasm for the future instead of fear. What a difference this can make! And there’s no better time to start than the present. Go for it!

It seems that everything you’ve ever learned is about preparing yourself for a better future. It’s easy to get so caught up in the future that you lose the ability to enjoy the life you’re living right now.

The Power Of The Present

The first thing you should do to take action toward a better life is to realize the power that the present moment holds. There are different ways you can truly come to this realization, but the most popular and widely accepted method is meditation.

Meditation allows you to clear your mind. It’s refreshing to focus on the present moment when you find the time to sit down and relax without any worries about the past or future.

This personal reflection time will allow you to sort out your inner thoughts. On the flipside, take note of the number of times your mind tries to distract you from the present moment. You’ll be surprised to see just how many times your mind steals the present moment from you, in order to dwell on the past or future.

Enjoying The Journey

Your journey is all you have. Your goals are important, but it’s the path you take toward your goals that yield many fruits. You must be willing to enjoy your life and live consciously, even if you haven’t yet reached your goals.

If you have a lofty goal, such as becoming a doctor or the CEO of a large company, realize that it will take much planning and years of experience. Once you reach your goal, you may feel fulfilled, but your life mustn’t be unhappy and miserable until you get there!

You can remain happy by concentrating on the present and enjoying the journey. As you make positive progress towards your goal, you’ll know that you’re always one step closer.

Envisioning Your Future Self

While you should spend a great deal of time enjoying the present moment, you can add to your happiness by envisioning your future self.

Reflect on the feelings associated with the successful completion of your goals. Think about the traits you’ll exhibit when you have the life you desire. Now bring those traits into your present.

If you’re studying to be a doctor, you’re working long days for little or no pay. You’re studying at all hours with little sleep. You might feel almost tortured. That’s not the desired life you dreamt of having!

This is when you should be proud of the steps you’ve taken so far. After all, what you’re learning now will shape your future, so you might as well approach today with joyful gratitude!

Live The Life You Want Now

Whether you maintain complete focus on your ultimate goals or not, it’s important to live the life you desire right now. You don’t know how many days you’ve been allotted on this earth, and you owe it to yourself to make the most of them!

Keep these tips in mind:

• Even on busy days, take at least some time for yourself
• Don’t waste your time on people who don’t believe in you and your abilities
• Adopt a “glass is half full” mentality

Most importantly, you need to believe in yourself. Some people are literally afraid of success. They’ll put off action toward their dreams indefinitely because they fear success and fear that they’re incapable.

You mustn’t fall into this negative pattern. Don’t waste your time on dead ends. Instead, take action, learn your lessons, and enjoy the journey!

Achieving your goals is hardly ever an easy journey. If it were easy, we’d all already be there. One of the keys to success is, without a doubt, perseverance. With improved perseverance you’ll have that extra push from within to try, try again.

Humans have the tendency to want to control everything. Since there are always situations that can’t be controlled, suffering occurs. Unfortunately, this suffering can’t be escaped. Your goal should never be to avoid mistakes at all costs and seek control. Your goal should be to strengthen your perseverance by effectively dealing with the situation when things go awry.

Keep these tips in mind as you strengthen your perseverance:

1. Never Give Up. When you have an ultimate goal, you owe it to yourself to completely follow through. There are going to be plenty of bumps in the road. Don’t let any of these bumps bring you down. Always be seeking new ways of approaching problems.
2. Seek Out the Positive. When things have become overwhelmingly negative for you, seek out positive things in your life. You might want to surround yourself with loved ones or watch positive movies. You definitely want to seek out situations that’ll promote your optimism and enthusiasm.
3. Take Action and Responsibility. Do whatever you can to inspire yourself to take bold actions toward your goal. Fight the urge to procrastinate or settle for less. Thinking about your goals is simply not enough; you need to start somewhere in order to get yourself there. You can’t wait for some sign or higher power to get you to where you want to go, you must be willing to take action!
4. Get Help When Needed. Be wise enough to know when a situation warrants help from others. You don’t need to take every single thing into your own hands. Instead, choose to follow advice from the people you trust or the experts in your chosen field. Flat out ask them how they’ve maintained the drive to keep going.
5. Know Your True Self. Knowing yourself and having organized thoughts can improve your perseverance. When you know where you’re going and the steps you need to take to get there, that’s half the battle. That’s why you need to take the proper amount of time for self-reflection. Know the true ins and outs of what you want and exactly why you want it.
6. Stop Bad Habits. Do everything in your power to put a stop to bad habits. If there are certain behaviors you’ve identified that are keeping you from achieving your goals, you need to get rid of them. This could be simply negative thinking or you might be fighting procrastination. When you concentrate on each bad habit individually, you’ll be better able to deal with the problems that might exist.
7. Concentrate on Stress Management. Stress management and your level of perseverance are definitely related. When stress overwhelms you, it clouds your current thinking and brings on negativity. Your perseverance can’t flourish in a negative environment. You must first conquer any problems you have with stress so you’ll be better able to reach your goals.

Step By Step

Perseverance is likely already a part of your life. You just need to bring it out and strengthen its existence. It all boils down to the power of thought. When you think you can, you will. When you think you can’t, you won’t.

By Kristin & David Morelli

If you were really honest with yourself, what would you do if you were asked to push way past your comfort zone by someone you respect, admire and believe can help you transcend your limitations? Would you keep pushing? What if it meant your body was putting out massive danger signals or people around you were suffering obvious signs of distress? Where would your personal limit be and would you even listen to it? What if that guru told you the only way to enlightenment was to learn from them?

These are the very questions that have come up for tens of thousands of people, if not more, as a result of the recent sweat lodge tragedy at a James Ray event last month. When we posted this to our Facebook walls, intense discussion ensued. Many people are understandably shaken by this turn of events and wanting to send light and love to all those affected, especially those who died or were injured and their loved ones.

The hot topic that emerged was “guru-ism”: giving your power away to a person in a position of authority or leadership in your life at the expense of listening to your inner wisdom. We are going to explore this very topic on the Everything Is Energy Radio Show.

Some opportunity for insight in the meantime:

How do you spot “Guru-ism”?
Ask the following questions:

• Does the person require you to trust them above trusting yourself?
• Do they say “You should do ________”?
• Do they use fear as a motivation to believe them?
• Do they discourage you from learning from other teachers and only them?
• Do they hold themselves to be above you or better than you?
• Do you feel the only way to get your answers or what you desire is “through them”?

How do you know which spiritual leaders to trust?
In our opinion, on your spiritual path, the only people to listen to are those who have the following practices:

• The person leads you back to discovering your OWN answers.
• The person invites your inner wisdom to be your guide.
• The person invites you to decide for yourself if what he/she is saying is true.
• The person celebrates your creativity, breakthroughs, and upliftment.
• You feel more like yourself when you’re around them.
• The person takes responsibility for their actions.

Remember, all of your answers are within.  The most skilled of masters will lead you back to those answers, encouraging your self-discovery and unique expression of “YOU”!

Join us 11/12, Thursday at 10 a.m. PST at www.EverythingIsEnergy.com (click Radio) for our Radio Show on the James Arthur Ray tragedy.

©2009 One Energy International, LLC

IF YOU’D LIKE TO USE THIS ARTICLE OR EZINE ON YOUR WEBSITE, YOU CAN! Simply include this complete statement with it: “Radio show hosts, coaches and online business experts David and Kristin Morelli publish the Everything Is Energy newsletter to 26,000+ subscribers. If you’re ready to make a quantum leap in your energy, wealth, relationships, health, business and spirituality get your FREE tips now at www.EverythingIsEnergy.com“

You already know that to-do lists help you get focused and organized throughout the day. When you have your to-do list in hand, you’re freeing your mind from all the disorganized thoughts and, instead, getting them down on paper.

However, this technique can go awry if your to-do list isn’t organized as well as it should be. You might lose your motivation and drive and, at the end of the day, you may notice that most of the things from your list are not crossed off.

Follow these tips to create an effective to-do list:

1. Clarify Priorities. It may help you to develop some sort of ranking system for your to-do list. Certainly every item on the list can’t be equally important. You can even use a number system and rank them from 1 to 5. Items ranked 1 might have a lower priority, while the 5s are tasks you should attend to first.
2. Pare Down the List. You need to complete tasks or part of tasks one step at a time. If you have 15 minutes to spare, find something on the list that you can complete in that time period. It’s common to tell yourself that 15 minutes is not enough time to do something, but all those 15-minute chunks add up to something huge. At the end of the day you’ll be surprised how much you’ve accomplished in small increments.
3. Include Flex Time. If your to-do list is too rigid, it simply won’t be effective. You absolutely need to include some flexibility and breathing room in your day. Try not to jam pack your day with unreasonable goals, otherwise, you’ll be at risk of disappointment.
4. Add in Something Fun. Your to-do list is no doubt full of things you may not be looking forward. That’s why integrating fun activities and tasks should also be a priority! When you add in a fun item it doesn’t feel like work. It may even feel like a break. When you return to the less desirable items, you’ll be more motivated to actually get them done.
5. Don’t List Too Much. It’s vital not to overwhelm yourself. While some days might be action packed in order to reach certain deadlines, you need to avoid this level of stress on a regular basis. If there’s too much on your plate, or you have to work too fast, you can’t possibly enjoy yourself and you’ll only end up frustrated and overwhelmed.
6. Keep It Organized. Your list needs to be organized in a way that makes you feel comfortable. There are many options nowadays, especially with digital devices. However, the old-fashioned pen and paper method may be what works best for you. You can also opt for using the internet or even your cell phone or mobile device to keep your list organized.

• You should also clarify your priorities in the sense that you need to leave yourself detailed instructions. Figure out the: who, what, where, when and why of items that may be complicated. This way, when it comes time to tackle the task, you won’t skip over them simply because they seem too complex to complete.