Wings of Change – Change Your Life Articles

If you find yourself afraid of an upcoming speech, you’re not alone. The fear of public speaking is one of the top fears out there, but you can still do something about it.

You hear over and over again that practice makes perfect, and this also applies to public speaking. Any sort of public speaking – even when you speak out in your group of friends – can ease you into the public speaking role.

Here are some actions you can take to reduce your fear of public speaking:

1. Be prepared. In most public speaking situations you can use notes. Make sure you organize your notes and break them down into an organized list where you highlight two or three key talking points. If you can’t use notes, simply make it a point to practice your speech until you feel comfortable saying it in front of others. You might still have some fear, but being well prepared can definitely combat this feeling.
2. Don’t expect perfection. It’s important not to expect that your speech will be perfect. In fact, chances are your audience doesn’t expect perfection either. They understand that everyone makes mistakes and they, themselves, may be afraid of public speaking! You might skip over a part of your talk or stutter a little, and these are all natural human mistakes.
3. Speak in small groups. If you’re uncomfortable speaking in front of a large group, then start small. Practice on small groups and ask for feedback afterwards. You can have a confidential feedback form, or you can just ask participants what they thought of your speech.
4. Have a backup plan. It’s always advisable to have a back up plan in life situations and public speaking is not an exception. Think about what you might want to say if you get stuck. If your mind goes blank, take a deep breath and start your backup plan. Chances are you’ll find yourself back on track before you know it.
5. Relax. It’s important to get yourself into the right mindset before you have to speak. Consider starting a ritual that you find relaxing in order to keep your mind off of your fears. You could meditate or do a crossword puzzle, whatever it is, just choose an activity that helps you relax.

The Audience

The audience is the whole reason that you’re afraid to make your speech, but it helps to know that they’re on your side. Keep a positive attitude because chances are good that the audience wants you to succeed in your speech.

In the end, it’s important to remember that even if you do mess up, it’s not the end of the world. As long as you’ve prepared yourself well enough and have a back up plan in place, you’ll be able to pick yourself back up if you trip up anywhere in your speech.

After your presentation, it’s important to take notes and critique yourself on how it went. Write down your observations on what you did well in addition to areas of improvement.

As you continue to practice your public speaking skills, you’ll get better and more comfortable in time. Just keep at it!

You might already be familiar with the power of affirmations. They’re short, positive statements that you can read, repeat to yourself, or listen to from recordings. With affirmations, you can reprogram your subconscious mind to help you think more positively about yourself.

An example of an affirmation is “I am calm and relaxed.” It doesn’t matter what your current state actually is, you can still achieve this state by repeating and believing the affirmation. Your subconscious mind will pick up on the statement and bring forth the new feelings.

Affirmations Can Change Your Life

When it comes to the world of affirmations, the only requirement is to approach it with an open mind. After that, you simply allow the statements to wash over you and you can change your life all by yourself.

It’s may seem difficult at first, but the key is to get the affirmation into your subconscious mind. This is easiest when you’re just waking up or when you’re drifting off to sleep. These are moments when your conscious mind is less likely to interfere.

If you use the “I am calm and relaxed” example without an open mind, of course your conscious mind will say “Hey! I’m not calm and relaxed.” Don’t get frustrated if your conscious mind likes to jump in a lot; eventually the messages will make it to your subconscious mind.

How Affirmations Work

If you pay close attention to how your mind really works, you’d be surprised at how often your mind slips into negativity about yourself and other situations. Using affirmations will allow you to communicate with your subconscious mind and change those thoughts.

Affirmations have the power to recode your mind in the same manner that a computer program can be written. You actively spend time saying and concentrating on these short positive statements and, eventually, your subconscious mind picks up on them.

It may take some time and practice for affirmations to work for you. Some people report that they see results from their efforts right away, while others find that it takes longer for them to reach the subconscious.

How To Use Affirmations

There are a few ways that you can choose to use your affirmations. First, concentrate on the things in your life that you want to change. Try to keep it simple by focusing on one at a time.

Common topics are usually health, wealth and relationships. You might use affirmations such as “I feel energized” or “I enjoy my job.” Write a few different ones that pertain to the same subject.

Then choose a time to repeat the sayings to yourself every day. You can even make a recording of yourself repeating the affirmations with soothing music in the background. This is especially helpful for using affirmations in the morning and at night when you have a stronger link to your subconscious.

Tips for writing your own affirmations:

• Write them in the present tense, because that’s the only way to improve your life in the present moment.
• Be short and concise to keep things simple.
• Read and write your affirmations when you’re calm and away from distractions.
• Remember to stay positive.

Wash, Rinse, Repeat

Make sure you keep up with your affirmations. If you don’t see results right away, try sticking with it for a while longer. Before you know it, you’ll realize that these short simple sentences have improved your outlook, one thought at a time!

When you live consciously in the present moment, you’re free from the stresses of life. It enables you to feel calm and to think with an astounding clarity.

Living in the moment sounds easy, but it will take some effort until you get into the habit. After all, with so much going on around us, it’s easy to get distracted by fears, worries, frustrations, and stress. But once you get used to it, though, you’ll wonder how you could have lived any other way!

What can you do to make living in the moment your way of life?

Try these steps in order to gain present-moment thinking:

1. Meditate. The very point of meditation is to live in the present moment and accept things just as they are. It’s a practice that you’ll get better at the more you do it. To help quiet your mind, the best thing you can do is focus on your breathing and keep striving to release your thoughts with each breath you take.
2. Accept the past. You’ll feel better about yourself once you learn to accept past situations. There’s nothing you can do to change the past. Bringing the past into your present only clouds your present thinking and makes it harder for you to concentrate on the present moment.

• Thoughts of the past will still arise, but when you learn to accept it for what it is, you’ll be able to return to the present moment without regret or grief.

1. Accept the future. On the other side of the coin, you also need to accept the future. You ultimately have no idea about what’s going to happen, and worrying about it won’t make an ounce of difference.

• How much time do you waste in a day by sitting around thinking about what you’re going to do? When you stop thinking, you have more time to actually do it!

1. Be mindful. When you’re mindful, you pay close attention to what you’re doing in the present. You may think it’s just a mundane chore, but it’s important to do it with an open mind. Open up your senses to what you’re doing. You might be overwhelmed with positive feelings that you didn’t know existed.
2. Get in touch with nature. Take some time to get in touch with nature. You can go for a walk or just sit under a tree. There aren’t many things that can open you up to the present moment like opening up to the vastness of nature.

Remember To Relax

As long as you maintain a relaxed attitude, you can achieve conscious living if you keep trying.

It may help to think of yourself and your brain as separate entities. Your brain can be thinking thoughts all over the place while your “self” watches. When you maintain the wisdom to realize that your thoughts are out of control, the self can pull you back into the present.

Of course these goals are best achieved through meditative practice, but you can also try any activity that you find relaxing if meditation isn’t for you. While you’re relaxing, pay attention to your breathing and try to take deep breaths. Remind yourself that, in this moment, the past and the future don’t matter in the least.

After you’ve successfully added present moment thinking to a relaxing part of your day, it’s time to spread the awareness to other times of the day. The more time you can spend in the present, the better. Live in the here and now, and enjoy a more fulfilling life!

If you’ve lost your job, there’s no denying that it can be a devastating ordeal. It can be a real burden, especially when your whole family depended on that job and the income it provided.

However, you can find the strength to recover from a tragic job loss. Sometimes it’s difficult to find the silver lining, but it’s always there waiting to be discovered.

Focusing On Your Self-Esteem

Your thoughts are very powerful. Sometimes you may think that you don’t have control over your thoughts, but you always do. Of course you should give yourself time to recover from the initial shock of a job loss, but it’s how you choose to react afterwards that makes all the difference.

When you focus on developing positive self-esteem, you’ll be able to think clearly and confidently so you can figure out what your next steps are going to be. You may even use this new opportunity to finally follow your dream job.

Have these tips in mind to keep your self-esteem intact:

1. Give yourself time to grieve. Sometimes you don’t think of job loss as being the same as other types of loss, but the shock can be the same and you should allow yourself some time to go through the standard stages of grief. You’ll eventually recover from the shock, but give yourself an appropriate amount of time to absorb the situation.
2. Look for a support system. You might feel especially alone after losing your job. Your initial reaction might be to run and hide and keep your emotions inside. Be sure to fight this feeling and, instead, rely on your support system. Remember: it’s okay to ask for help, that’s what your support network is for!
3. Keep up your motivation. After the shock has worn off, it’s important to strive for a certain level of enthusiasm and motivation to find another job. You need to believe in yourself and trust that things will turn out for the best. Remember that your new job might be even better than your last one!
4. Looking for a new job. When you’re ready to start the search, consider all of your options. You may want to consider whether or not you really enjoyed the field you were in before. Consider your job loss as a new opportunity. Maybe you’d like to try bringing your life into a different direction.
5. Keep an eye on your finances. When you deal with job loss, you must also deal with the financial realities. Determine your current financial situation and how long you have until you must return to work. Maybe you have to find a job right away, or perhaps you have enough savings to consider other career options. Whatever the case may be, you should know what the financial implications mean to you and your family.

New Life: New Opportunities

After dealing with job loss, the best thing you can do is to think of it as a new opportunity in life. Sure, you didn’t choose to embark on this path at this particular time, but it’s important to roll with the punches.

Don’t be afraid to take risks. Also, don’t be afraid to adopt the attitude that everything happens for a reason. Bad things happen in life, but good things happen too. Stay strong for yourself and your family and your self-esteem will prevail.

Negativity always finds a way to creep up in your life from time to time. It’s when negativity builds up too much or shows up too often that you have an obstacle to overcome.

A negative attitude can hold you back from truly living your life. However, you don’t need to feel stuck because you can bring positive thoughts back into your life!

How Negativity Can Hold You Back

Negativity can hold you back in a number of ways. Have you heard the saying: “If you think you can’t, you’re right”? It’s true! Negative thoughts like this really do sabotage your efforts.

The good news is that you can gain control over how you think. When you’re expressing complaints and negativity all the time, it not only affects you, but it also affects the people around you. Negativity, itself, can be the reason why you create roadblocks that don’t really exist! So it’s time to choose the positive (and, yes, it is a choice!).

Manifesting A Positive Attitude

When you adopt a positive attitude, you open yourself up to the wonderful world of possibilities. When positive energy is in the air, you’ll be able to transform your negative feelings and maybe even bring others out of their negativity clouds.

Believe it or not, positive thinking is very powerful. It’s the driving force that steers your life into the direction of your dreams. Remember, your thoughts affect how you feel, and how you feel affects what you do, so if you can change your thoughts, you can change your outcome.

How To Develop A Positive Attitude

How can you change your attitude? It’s easier than you think.

Follow these tips to develop a positive attitude:

1. Visualize. When the negative thoughts come crawling into your mind, transform them with positive images. Visualize something that you find pleasing, peaceful, or exciting. Remember what your ultimate goals are and imagine what it feels like to achieve them.
2. Write it down. Keeping a journal has many positive effects. It helps you vent your frustrations, organize your life, and reflect on your innermost thoughts and feelings. Instead of focusing on the bad, use your journal to chronicle the things that have gone well in your life lately.
3. Relax. Negative feelings are bound to arise when you’re in a stressful state. It’s important to take time out of each day for yourself. This means that you need to adopt a relaxation method that works for you. Perhaps you can take a bath, go to church, attend a yoga class, or meditate. When you’re relaxed, a peaceful and positive mindset will likely overtake you.
4. Read and write affirmations. Grab a book with positive affirmations in it, or better yet, write your own. Affirmations are a powerful way to bring positive thoughts into your present state of well being. Affirmations are short statements in the present tense that remind you of positive attributes and goals in your life. Here’s an example: “I am strong and competent.”
5. Live for the moment. Live your life for the moment and let go of everything else going on in your life. Negative feelings can easily overwhelm you if you’re consumed by past failures or the fear of the future. When you concentrate on the present, your life becomes more peaceful and positive.

In the end, go easy on yourself. You don’t need to be your own worst critic, instead, try being your biggest advocate! Just concentrate on your well being and you will develop a more positive attitude.

Affirmations are everywhere, and they have the strong ability to lift your spirits to get through hard times. This is because we’re all highly suggestible, even if we think we’re not!

Affirmations help us to keep a positive attitude about life. It’s only natural that we’ll get more out of these positive sayings if we formulate them ourselves. Writing our own affirmations makes them personal to us, which can then help us to get through our own individual situations.

When you start writing your own affirmations, keep these tips in mind:

1. Make them personal. When you write affirmations, it’s important to remember to use “I” in them. They are personal to you after all.
2. Use the present tense. Affirmations are built in order to change our feelings now, which is why you want to stay positive and strong in this moment. When you use the past tense, you get nostalgic. When you use the future tense, you get hopeful. The present tense helps you feel the difference right now.
3. Be down to earth. This just means to use your own style and try not to make your affirmations too formal or wishy-washy. You want to capture your own voice.
4. Be short. Affirmations are meant to be short, simple and sweet. Stay on target and make your affirmation a one-liner. If it’s too wordy, try breaking it up into a few affirmations. The trick is to stick with one simple idea at a time.
5. Make it positive. Affirmations are positive statements, so avoid negative words like “not.” You’re using affirmations to make a life improvement and positive statements motivate you to make this improvement.
6. Make it believable. You don’t want your affirmation to sound like something out of this world. If it’s not believable, you won’t take it seriously and your subconscious will just dismiss it.

• Example: “I am having an exceptional day today!”

• Example: “I am feeling relaxed.”

• Bad Example: “Presently I feel the urge to enjoy my existence.”
• Good Example: “I enjoy my life.”

• Example: “I am in perfect health.”

• Example: “I am at peace with my mind.”

• Example: “I am choosing to be happy today.”

Believe in the Power of Affirmations

When you say your affirmations, believe them to be true. Affirmations are truly powerful sets of words as long as you believe what you’re telling yourself.

Affirmations alone have been known to help people cure addictions. Women even use them during childbirth to help them stay calm and collected during natural delivery.

First, set your eyes on your goal and then write your affirmations to get yourself there.

Write Them Down

Practice always makes perfect. Write down the affirmations you’re feeling. Then go over the list above and make sure that your affirmations follow the rules. Once they do, start using your affirmations and feel the difference. Say your affirmations to yourself daily. Take deep breaths and keep your eyes on your goal.

Also if need be, tweak your affirmations. These positive sayings aren’t written in stone, so as you change, your affirmations can change, too.

It’s best to keep your affirmations in a place where you can see them. You can simply keep a list in your pocket or you can post them around the house. Paste them on the bathroom mirror, on your computer, or wherever you know you’ll see them each day.

Affirmations can make all the difference in reaching your goals. Give them a try and enjoy the benefits these positive statements can make in your life.

Failure has touched the lives of everyone at some point. Because of this fact, you know how horrible it can make you feel. No wonder you strive to avoid it at all costs!  But the problem is that this fear of failure can become one of your biggest life fears.

Fear of failure is a fear of the great unknown. You don’t know what’s truly out there, and so you’re scared. You might even be tempted to give up entirely in order to avoid failure. You’ll soon realize that not trying at all is the ultimate failure because there is no way to win without trying.

How can you overcome this fear and gain the confidence you need to seek the life you desire?

Consider trying one or more of these actions steps:

1. Imagine the worst case scenario. Of course, you should spend time imagining everything turning out well, but it actually helps to imagine the worst case as well. This is because, while horrible, imagining the worst case gives your fears a face. Your fears are then no longer the unknown and they may not be quite as scary.

• When you figure out the worst thing that can happen, you just might realize that the most a failure can do is to delay your ultimate goal. But if you can figure out how to get past this possible delay, you’re back on track!

1. Take bold action. The fear of failure can hold you hostage. When you take bold action, you’re able to learn from your mistakes so you can continuously moving forward.
2. Talk to successful people. Ask them about times that they’ve failed or times that they’ve felt a fear of failure. It’s likely that they were afraid too and that they’ve even failed greatly before reaching success. Knowing that you’re not alone can be quite helpful.
3. Utilize affirmations. Use the help of affirmations in order to change your mindset about your fears. Affirmations can help you reprogram your subconscious mind so that you believe you’ll succeed, which will encourage you to take action to make it happen.
4. Know that you’ll try again. Tell yourself that, if you’re face to face with failure, you will pick yourself up and try again no matter how many tries it takes. Then follow your plan.

Don’t Be Afraid Of Help

Since the fear of failure is so common, there are many people around you that you can talk to about the subject. You might feel like you’re alone, but you’re not. Discuss your issues with a trusted friend or use the services of a professional counselor.

Sometimes just having someone listen and understand you can make your fears seem like less of a burden. It can help you to get into a positive mindset, which is the first step you’ll need to take in order to tackle your fear of failure head-on.

The Long Term

After you’ve mastered your fear of a particular situation, keep at it in order to stay on top of your fears. The key is consistency and positive thoughts. Remember that there are always lessons to be learned on your journey, even if you’ve failed. Keep at it and good things will come!

Communication is the key when it comes to anything that involves collaboration. Since humans are a social species, communication is involved in nearly everything you do.

Some people are born with the natural ability to communicate well, while others may struggle with it. No matter what category you fall into, it’s likely that you can benefit from paying attention to improving your communication skills.

Why Better Communication Helps You

Did you know that most businesses consider your communication skills to be the most important characteristic about you? This means that you could have top-notch knowledge and job skills but still fail to land a job if you’re lacking in the communication department.

Communication is certainly not only important when it comes to your work life, but it’s also vital in having a successful home life as well. Couples and family members that are good communicators lead happier lives overall.

Proper communication will prevent misunderstandings and save you time so you won’t have to go back and explain yourself again and again. You know you’ve gained good communication skills when you can communicate your thoughts effectively with as few words as necessary!

How To Improve Communication With Others

Communication is a two way street. This means that you could have excellent skills, but if the recipient is lacking, then you may not be understood. This is why it’s important not only to develop our speaking skills, but our listening skills, too.

Since you can’t affect the skill level of others, the only thing you can do is strengthen your own communication skills. Besides, when you’re an excellent communicator, more people will understand you, everything around you will run more efficiently, and you’ll more often get what you want!

Try these strategies to improve your communication skills:

1. Avoid arguing. If you run into a snag in a conversation and it starts to morph into an argument, step back and realize what’s going on. It’s easy to get swept up into the blame game, but ultimately it’s not important who’s at fault. What’s important is the mutual understanding of the issue at hand and a desire for a solution that benefits everyone.
2. Don’t be afraid to compromise. You may be tempted to try and “win” but that’s not the best way to reach a mutual agreement. You may be happier with getting your way, but it may come at the expense of the other person, which can cause further issues. Find a good compromise that you both can willingly accept.
3. Work on listening. Your listening skills are even more important than your speaking skills. After all, how will you know what you should say – and when – if you haven’t effectively listened? Listen more than you speak and you’ll gain a profound wisdom of others, too!
4. Keep your focus. Communication will get overly complicated if you worry about too many issues at once. Avoid bringing up the past or other issues and, instead, focus on the one topic at hand.
5. Stay calm and take responsibility. Adopt a calm and cool manner of handling situations. When things remain low key, it’s easier to communicate and get your point across. This also means that you need to take responsibility for what you say. Don’t be afraid to admit mistakes when you’re wrong.

Becoming a better communicator doesn’t happen overnight. But if you keep practicing and tweaking your skills, you’ll be surprised at what you can accomplish.

It’s easy to get drawn into a negative relationship. It may have started out seemingly perfect, but things seemed to change overnight. It may be time to decide whether or not the positive attributes outweigh the negative ones when it comes to your relationship choices.

If you’re unhappy and emotionally drained after a break up, you might not be feeling too optimistic about throwing yourself back out there. However, opening yourself up to new opportunities is the only way you’re going to reach the happiness you seek.

The best thing you can do is to educate yourself well enough to know what to look for and what to avoid. It’s not a fail-proof plan, but by following certain strategies, you can increase your chances of a lasting relationship.

Try taking these actions to avoid negative relationships:

1. Avoid falling back on the wrong person. If you’re feeling particularly lonely, you may feel the urge to fall back on someone that’s not right for you. Deep down you know that this person is not “the one” and yet you come crawling back anyway trying to convince yourself that maybe the person can change. Chances are, they won’t.
2. Spend time getting to know your partner. Focus on getting to know your partner first before getting too serious in the relationship. Try to have some of the heavy conversations near the beginning of the relationship. This way if you hit major snags you can either decide to work through it or move on quickly.
3. Learn your partner’s history. Are there disturbing events in his or her past? It’s clearly best to avoid people who have a history of violence or intense addiction. If they do and you choose to proceed with the relationship, be extra cautious and set the ground rules from the beginning.
4. Avoid manipulative people. You might not realize it at first, but if you find that you’re being manipulated often, it can prove to be a serious drain on your relationship. If your partner is controlling and always has a selfish motive for their actions, it isn’t the best relationship to be in. Recognize these red flags when you see them and get out before you get too attached.
5. Make a checklist. Take some time to make a list of the qualities you’d like to see in a partner. Include qualities you like as well as qualities that you dislike. This checklist will help you determine whether the relationship is right for you. Here’s a tip: avoid writing down superficial characteristics such as looks. First and foremost, you must be attracted to his or her personality because the superficial things can and will change as you age.

Relationships can be difficult; it’s just a reality of human nature. The fact that many relationships end shouldn’t have any impact on your hope for the future. There are plenty of people out there that will be a good match, so it’s okay to avoid relationships that sap your soul.

Remember: you do have a choice! Focus on finding the right partner for you and then take action to make it the positive relationship you’ve always dreamed of!

All actions start as mere thoughts. When you set out to reach your goals, negative thinking pretty much ends your journey right there. You end up losing your drive, which you need in order to get anything done.

Thinking optimistically can be the difference between easily reaching success and falling short. But how can you start thinking optimistically? There are certain actions you can take that will help you shift your core beliefs.

Try these steps in order to set yourself up for success with optimism:

1. Expect the best. You should know your desired outcome for your ultimate goals and believe that the best case scenario can prevail. You may tend to drift into the “what if” thoughts from time to time, but you also have the power to fight them. If you catch yourself thinking this way, immediately shift your focus onto something positive.
2. Take immediate action. Reaching your ultimate goals can be intimidating. There might be many things holding you back, including the fear of failure. But when you take immediate action, you leave no time for pessimistic thoughts to arise. You’ll plough forward in a positive direction.
3. Seek the silver lining. No doubt there will be situations that present challenges to you. You must believe that everything happens for a reason and that there’s a silver lining somewhere in this challenge. Do your best to learn from the situation and then actively seek the best direction forward.
4. Write down your thoughts. You can certainly benefit from a brain dump every now and then. Write down your thoughts, including your fears, in order to vent. Take note of your positive thoughts as well. By writing everything down, you’ll gain clarity about your goals.

Worrying About Challenges

Don’t waste your time worrying about the challenges at hand or ahead. Once you realize that worrying serves no purpose, you’ll be better able to let them go. Chances are things will work out for the best. You need to believe this in order to achieve an optimistic attitude.

Realism will tell you that there’s the possibility of failure. While that may be true, you shouldn’t focus on it. Worrying about failure will not make it any easier to endure if it happens, and it can even cause you to attract that failure to you!

Worrying only hurts you in the present moment and keeps you from taking the positive action that can bring your goals to fruition.

Challenges Are Normal

When you realize that challenges are normal, they may be a tad easier to deal with. The fact is you’re faced with challenges of varying degrees everyday.

You already know that life throws challenges your way, but you must believe that you can overcome these challenges! Then, you’ll be able to conquer every obstacle with an optimistic attitude.

Discover What You Can Learn

There’s a lesson to be learned in each challenge. Realizing the lessons you’re presented with will allow you to grow as a person and learn from both your successes and failures. As you learn, you build confidence and confidence brings optimism.

Evaluate the outcome of a few different challenges your life has presented you. When you had an optimistic attitude, how did things turn out? When you had a pessimistic attitude, how did things turn out? Oftentimes your attitude alone can make a significant difference.

And remember, your attitude is your choice!